weateallthepies.com

“It’s PC gawnn maadd innit”…

Why do I keep hearing variations on that vacuous statement, even from people I thought were rather more rational.

Political correctness where it even exists is basically a way of stopping bigoted twunts (and those old people who don’t mean to…bless ‘em) from calling people names. It hasn’t “gone mad” and in fact if you scratch the surface of most of the stories you’ll probably just find a hole in your copy of the Daily Mail which seems to spend most of it’s time thinking up new things to be afraid of.

“Baa Baa Black Sheep has been changed to Baa Baa Rainbow Sheep”
Really? Did they update the big book of official nursery rhymes? I sang it recently with my daughter and nothing appeared to happen. We sang it at her playgroup and no PC Brigade crack squad stormed the building.
Go on, you still believe the story about the EU and bananas as well don’t you? It’s great when some story makes you feel ok about your xenophobia isn’t it? Go on shout something about foreigners you know you want to!

“They’ve banned christmas havn’t they”
Well “they” are doing a shit job at banning it whoever “they” are. You can’t get away from the bloody thing at the tail end of the year. Honestly people can stand in the highstreet with shops full of sparkly crap, lights on every lamp post and hateful christmas muzak being pumped out in every supermarket claiming that offended foreigners have somehow affected their mundane excuse for a christmas. I recommend beating them with their own gargantuan turkey whilst screaming “Is this christmassy enough for you!”

“This is a christian country”
This one usually has nothing to do with political correctness and is generally followed by some inarticulate rant about muslims or just vaguely brown looking people. Firstly this is not a christian country it is by and large a secular one which just has an odd cultural love affair with it’s christian past. This is evidenced by the people usually making the above statement who generally don’t look like the sort to be drinking tea with the local vicar. Funny how people suddenly find religion if it means they can shout about foreigners.

Aaargggh it’s annoying, anyway here’s Stewart Lee making more sense than me: